18
Jun
08

Projectile Underwear

Straight from the Consumerist:

Macrida Patterson, age 52, is suing Victoria’s Secret, claiming that because of a design problem, a decorative metallic piece affixed to her thong became airborne and struck her in the eye as she was attempting to put on the garment, according to The Smoking Gun. The thong is called a “low-rise v-string” from their “Sexy Little Thing” line (pictured left). The injury has supposedly caused damage to her cornea, causing her to miss work and “will be affecting her the rest of her life.”

Patterson’s lawyer, Jason Buccat, told TSG that a “design problem” caused the decorative piece to come loose and strike Patterson in the eye, causing damage to her cornea. He added that the eye injury, which caused Patterson to miss a few days of work, will be “affecting her the rest of her life.” Patterson is a traffic officer with L.A.’s Department of Transportation. Prior to the lawsuit’s filing, Victoria’s Secret officials asked to examine the garment and the decorative piece, but that request was rejected by Patterson’s counsel. For those unfamiliar with “v-strings,” the undergarment is the Victoria’s Secret variant on the “g-string,” which has long been favored in the battle against visible panty lines.

Umm, right…

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1 Response to “Projectile Underwear”


  1. 1 nick
    June 20, 2008 at 1:58 pm

    I read this the other day and just got a huge laugh out of it. I mean, first, what the hell was this woman doing that caused a “decorative piece” to fly off at such velocity to cause harm? My mind has turned summersaults trying to figure this out. Even with the abundance of elastic – I’m really not sure abundance is a word often used when talking about g-strings. Unless of course…well OK. lets just leave that there. Second, what is a 52 year old woman doing in a g-string? OK, I’m closer to 52 than 25. Alot closer. And god knows that the libedo doesn’t die at that age like I thought it would when I was 25. But I’m not sure I’d want my beloved wife to don a g-sting for me. Hhmmmm….OK maybe i would. I don’t really know. Still! Fifty two? G-string? Yet another two concepts that aren’t often heard together.

    Lastly, well I don’t have a lastly, so I’ll just recap. Is it even physically possible to fire somthing hard enough using a g-string to cause harm? and Fifty two and in a g-string? I am amazed at the inginuity and letigineousness (I’m sure i misspelled that -sorry) of modern man.


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