A Fish Worth Fighting For

It’s not often that one can blend stupidity from three distinct areas of regular silliness. It turns out that politics, food and religion have, indeed joined forces. Gefilte fish is one of those nasty traditional Jewish foods that very few actually like. Take some nasty fish, debone it, and then grind it up with some onions, eggs and matzoh. Squish it into loaves and poach it with carrots and more onions. Take these poached loaves and dump them in a jar full of translucent slime that is the consistency of runny snot. Serve at family meals. Ugh.

Apparently, it’s now a matter of highest concern for our Department of State. Seems as though the Hildabeest is taking on a trade dispute with Israel as a highest level mission.

Food: What Were They Thinking?

Deviled Dogs

• 5 corn dogs
• 10 tater tots
• 1/4 cup shredded Cheddar cheese
• 2 Tbs Mayonnaise
• Salt and pepper to taste
• Paprika

1. Bake the corndogs amd tater tots according to package directions.
2. When corndogs are cool enough to handle, remove the sticks, and split in half lengthwise.
3. Remove the hot dog part, leaving the cornbread shell intact.
4. Put the dogs, tots, cheese, mayo, salt and pepper into a food processor and process until smooth.
5. Fill each corn shell with an equal amount of the potato mixture. If you have a pastry bag, use it!
6. Sprinkle paprika over the top.
7. Return to the oven, and bake until top is browned, about 5 minutes.

Best New Product at SHOT Show

SHOT Show is the international trade show for all things gun, hunting, tactical, etc. It’s not really open to the public, but consistently draws 50,000ish folks every year. Lots of companies vie for the official and unofficial honors of best in show. This would be my vote.

Unused Shop Tools?

My friend Art bought a small Jet lathe that served as a glorified coffee cup holder for several years. What seemed like a good idea at the time never quite made it to actual use in his shop. At some point, I asked for the tool and took it home with me.  I use it regularly for various projects. Good thing that Art never saw this video on Youtube. I guess one can always come up with alternate uses for quality tools!

How Fresh is Fresh?

I’ll admit that I enjoy enjoy sushi. And I will also enthusiastically acknowledge that the freshness of the seafood is a HUGE factor in having a wonderful experience. That said, this is going a bit too far…

Arby’s: Bad Omen?

I’m thinking that Arby’s was a bad move for lunch today. My youngest spawn pointed to my curly fries and asked “what happened to that one?”… It was kinda distorted and I realized that it looked like an Ebola virus. I also realized that there was absolutely no way I could explain Ebola to blossoming teen girl whose only item of fixation was the Jonas Brothers. So I ate it.

Better Than Boobies

That, my friends, is fried spam on a stick. And no, it’s not really better than boobies. For more gut wrenching gastronomy, go here.

It’s Alive

Or… it was very close to being alive before Oleg snapped the picture. I’m not quite sure what the roll is composed of, but I’d eat it!

Too Much Pork?

It’s a sausage wrapped pork tenderloin that is served with brussels sprouts. I’ve never been a big fan of those little bitter green balls of bitterness. But this much pig might make me change my mind… Thanks Slashfood!

For the Tenderloin:

2 each pork tenderloin
1/2 lb. fat back
1 1/2 lb. pork butt
1 Pinch of sel rouge (Curing Salt)
1 teaspoon fennel seed, ground
1 teaspoon coriander, ground
1 teaspoon black pepper, ground
3 cloves of garlic
3 sprigs of parsley
1 cup caul fat

For the Farrotto:

2 1/2 cups Farro
1/2 piece of fennel, diced
1/2 piece medium onion, diced
2 quarts of chicken stock
3 sprigs of parsley, chopped
1/2 cup butter, cubed

For the Brussels Sprouts:

1 cup of cleaned brussels sprouts blanched quickly in water
1 1/2 cup of thinly slice bacon
1/4 cup of golden raisins
1 tablespoon grapeseed oil

PREPARATION:

For Pork Tenderloin:

1. Clean the Pork Tenderloin and portion the 2 into 6 portions. Chef Di Meglio prepares this dish at Olana using authentic Berskshire pork from D’Artagnan.

2. Add all other ingredients except for the caul fat. Mix well and grind finely (or, if you’re short on time, D’Artagnan has wonderful pre-made sausage).

3. Lay out the sausage on a piece of plastic wrap and roll it around the pork tenderloin.

4. Wrap it lightly in the caul fat to help its keep shape. Cook on a greased baking sheet in a 400° F oven for 12-15 minutes.

5. Let it rest for 5 minutes and slice.

For Farotto:

1. In a medium sized pan with a little oil to coat the bottom of the pan add the fennel and onions and cook soft.

2. Add the Farro to the pan and toast it lightly.

3. Add the chicken stock. Stir until soft.

4. When the farro is soft, add the herbs and butter. Set aside to plate.

For the Brussels Sprouts:

1. In a pan add the oil and start to render the bacon until golden brown.

2. Add the brussels sprouts and cook until they get a little color and are cooked thoroughly.

3. Finally add the raisins and continue to cook for 3 more minutes.

Plating: Smear farro on center of plate, spoon aside the brussels sprouts. Lay pork on top and enjoy while hot!

Tuna Tonight

Shamelessly reprinted from Slashfood:

Spicy Tuna Cups

5 small Persian or Kirby cucumbers
1/4 cup rice wine vinegar
1 teaspoon sugar
1 teaspoon salt
1 1-inch piece of lemongrass, cut in half
1 scallion, white part only, chopped
1 pound of sushi grade tuna
1/4 cup reduced-fat mayo
1 tablespoon hot chili sauce
1/4 teaspoon salt
1/4 cup black or white sesame seeds for garnish

In a small saucepan, heat rice wine vinegar, sugar, salt, lemongrass and scallion. Simmer 2-3 minutes until the sugar and salt dissolves. Set aside.

Peel the cucumbers and slice into 1-inch chunks. With a paring knife or melon baller, prepare your cup by hollowing out one side of the cucumber.

Pour the cooled vinegar mixture into a zipper-lock bag and add the cucumber cups. Marinate for 4-5 minutes.

In a food processor or mini-chopper, pulse the tuna. Mix in the mayo and chili sauce. Season with salt.

Remove cucumber cups from marinade and fill with tuna mixture. Garnish with sesame seeds.