Archive for February 10th, 2008

10
Feb
08

Clinton Woes & Health Care

I’m flat out unimpressed with any of the viable candidates left in the race. Call it “electile dysfuntion”, but none of them even comes close to arousing me. I just cannot see where all of this is heading. Take the Clinton campaign. There’s a summary here, but suffice to say that Clinton is dead-locked with Obama, ran a little short on matching his spending, “loaned” her own campaign money (why not just give it like Romney?), had staffers go unpaid, then decided to pay them again.

Maybe this is about health care. Would having unpaid workers mean they couldn’t have health care coverage? Probably not. And maybe this has nothing to do with health care or public image. I get the fact that the US is one of the only “civilized” countries that does not provide universal coverage. I’ve heard the pros and cons of both sides of the argument. I’ve watched consumers of said plans extol the virtues of the coverage and simultaneously whine about how long they have to wait, what will or will not get fixed, how it will get fixed… and then participate in the national sport of tax evasion. But everyone is covered. I’ve seen people in the US head over to the UK to get treatments that our beloved FDA will not allow. I’ve seen folks from Europe come here and fund their own procedures because their universal coverage cannot or will not provide the service. I dunno which is better. I don’t like the idea of having to pay for everyone else’s unhealthy habits and I feel equally ungood about other folks subsidizing all of my maladies. But I like the idea that when somebody gets very sick or hurt and doesn’t have a pot to piss in… they get covered. I *think* that’s the way it works now in the US, but apparently not for all. In the Houston area are several “public” hospitals. Get shot or stabbed or start puking up pea soup, you go there and wait. Triage works to treat the most serious cases first, so it may be a good long wait. Eventually, you get fixed up… even if you have no insurance. Whatever.

10
Feb
08

Cutest Kitties In War

As originally posted in the Military Animals feature from the Cynical-C blog :

The earliest examples of cats being used in warfare dates back to the Ancient Egypt during a war against Persia. The Persians, fully aware of the reverance that Egyptians paid to their felines, rounded up as many cats as they could find and set them loose on the battlefield. When the Egyptians were faced with either harming the cats or surrendering, they chose the latter.

During World War I, cats were used in the trenches as an attempt to keep the rat population down and some cats were used as poison gas “detectors”.

The most creative way to use a cat as a weapon happened in World War II. The United States’ OSS (Office of Strategic Services, the precursor of the CIA) needed a way to guide bombs to sink German ships. Somebody hit upon the inspiration that since cats have such a strong disdain of getting wet and always land on their feet that if you attached a cat to a bomb and drop it in the vicinity of a ship, the cat’s instinct to avoid the water would force it to guide the bomb to the enemy’s deck. It is unclear how the cat was supposed to actually guide a bomb attached to it as it fell from the sky but the plan never got past the testing stages since the cats had a bad habit of becoming unconscious mid-drop.

Not to be outdone by its predecessor, the CIA also attempted to use cats but this time as a bugging device during the Cold War. Although a disaster as a guided bomb, the CIA thought that a cat would make the perfect covert listening device in a project known as Operation Acoustic Kitty. They attempted to surgically alter the cat by placing a bugging device inside him and running an antenna through its tail. The project took five years and $15 million dollars before the first field test hit a slight snag when the bugged kitty was released near a Russian compound in Washington and was immediately hit by a car while crossing the street. The project was ended soon after.

Sources:
http://www.columbia.edu/cu/thefed/v3/volume18/9/militaryanimalsarefun.shtml
http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/americas/4808342.stm
http://www.iridescent-publishing.com/rtm/ch5p9.htm
http://www.damninteresting.com/?p=636
http://www.gwpda.org/photos/animals.htm

Head to the main link to find out about pigeons, bugs, dolphins, pigs, rats and bats being used for martial means.

10
Feb
08

Weirdness Invented and Personified

From Inventorspot

United States patent 5163447 is for a Force-Sensitive, Sound-Playing Condom! That’s right, it’s a musical condom! This baby looks and acts like a traditional condom and yet, manages to go a step further by incorporating “a chip-controlled piezoelectric sound transducer (18) which plays a melody or voiced message when during intercourse the contacts of the sound-playing unit are closed and the transducer is activated” by forceful movements. Just think of all the fun you’ll have – besides the sex of course.

Frankly (sorry about the pun), the only music that should be playing during this maneuver is something from Barry White and the Love Unlimited Orchestra…